Sunday, August 31, 2014

A Bit of Everything

1. Who Needs Sleeping Pills? Any grandparent who has ever run after young grandkids certainly do not. I was in bed every night 5 minutes after the two were tucked cosily into their beds. My alarm clock was the goofy goldie breathing heavily in my face at HER breakfast time.

2. Don't You Know..... That a) it isn't "my job to eat corn." Said the Humvee when I tried to sneak some corn in the funky mac and cheese I made. The Kumquat didn't think it was her job either, but she unceremoniously picked out each kernel and heaped them at the side of her plate. The Humvee made a trip to the garbage can, with each individual kernel of corn. And you know how many kernels are in a big can of Green Giant Niblets, right...?

3. Grandma Does Not Know How to Dress. Kids, maybe almost four year old little boys, to be exact. The great sock toe box is one example. If the pinkie toe is not included in the coloured toebox, well, "You're just doing it wrong, Grandma!" Apparently my Mom never learned me.

4. I Am Strong, I Am Invincible, I Am Grandma! As I tore through the end of the Reptilia exhibit and the Gift Shop, melting down almost four year old footballed under one arm, while wielding the jogging stroller with the Little One with the the other arm, through the crowds and out the door. It stopped when I couldn't fold the stroller down properly. Curses! Foiled again! But that's what SUVs are for.

And in the GWN (Great White North):

5. Fish hooks and fingers do not mix.

6. Neither do fish hooks and noses.

7. You would think that a nursing station, any nursing station, in the wilds of Northern Canada, would sport decent fish hook cutting implements, like a really decent set of wire cutters, or something like that. Since, you know, they fish up here. All. Year. Around. Ask the guys with the hooks in the finger and the nose. Apparently they don't have them either. Because hooks are meant for fish and not people.

8. DNR does not mean "Do Not Resuscitate" when emblazoned on the roof of an out building. Although some buildings look like they need it. It means "Department of Natural Resources." In case you were wondering.

9. GluStitch. The Krazy Glue of the medical world. Still holding my stethoscope together after 3 years. Imagine what it does for cuts.

10. How long does it take to fix water pipes? Apparently a very long time. And the workers come out at night, kind of like skunks. The water has been off most nights, without warning, and sometimes during the day, with and without warning. I think someone is just messing with our minds and playing with the switch. Would like to rap  some knuckles. Just saying.

11. Today I flew into my next assignment, in a true puddle jumper. A float plane, big enough for four, but carrying the pilot and myself. And as we glided over the Canadian north,  the magic reminded me that I am the most blessed and luckiest girl in the world.

And that is my little world for now. Love to all.

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